No Shame on You

As the dad of a 13 year old autistic boy, this is advice I would give to a younger me.

You feel some shame for your sons condition. Don't. There is no shame in being disabled. This should be obvious but it is not.

I had an interesting discussion about shame with a friend. They talked of feeling shame. They suffered through an illness and now there are things they can no longer do physically. They are now disabled and were ashamed to admit it.

Society has conditioned us to feel shame if we deviate at all from the status quo we see in the media. If you don't look like Megan Fox or George Clooney, you should be a little embarrassed. But if you, God forbid, become disabled through an accident or illness, you should feel shame. Not sadness over loss, but out and out shame.

You're disabled? You should hide.

You should tell no one.

Don't open up to others about what you are going through.

Life is always grand, we never go through any difficult times.

Fake it till you make it.

That is my least favorite one. I understand where it comes from. But if you fake it and then never make it, you're just a faker. Nice advice. Just lie to everyone and most importantly to yourself, forever. Great.

When I look around and see people with giant Cheshire cat grins on their faces, I always wonder: Real or replica, blissful or bitter?

People feel shame in disability when they should not. You should not feel shame for being something you did not chose. It is what it is.

Why do we suffer in pain, silently? Alone. Quieted by the shame. Why do we feel shame at all for suffering from a disability we did not chose?

We don't (and shouldn't) feel shame about your height, bone structure, skin color, or race, things we didn't decide. No one chooses disability.

In that way my son is lucky. He does not have societies baggage to deal with, shame is not something he struggles with. We have no shame in being who we are.

He could run through a Walmart, butt naked screaming and feel no shame. (Being Walmart, no one would even give him a second look, come on people, its Walmart).

Oh to be like my son and be yourself 100% of the time and feel no shame.

Inclusion in Mainstream Schools for Children With Learning Disabilities

In this article I am going to tell you how inclusion works in mainstream schools for children with disabilities. The reason I am going to tell you this is because inclusion can work very well for most special needs children.

In this article I am going to teach you

• The advantages and disadvantages of inclusion for children with learning disabilities
• The factors to consider before your child joins the same classroom as other "regular" students
• How to assess a successful inclusion program for your child with learning disabilities

There is a legal need to give an education system to children with disabilities in the "least restrictive environment".

As a means of interpreting these requirements, mainstream schools try to accommodate students with special needs or disabilities and integrate them into the classrooms along with their "normal" peers as much as practically possible.

To do this, they first need to consider the level of disability and effects of the disability on the child, and consequently the potential impact on fellow students and teaching requirements.

Inclusion can bring about a win-win situation for all students where special needs children can learn social skills from their peers. They will also receive the same or a similar education as them, and the typical mainstream students will get to appreciate diversity, learn empathy and build mutually rewarding friendships with other special needs children.

However, inclusion may not always work well. For example a student may be disruptive, need more help than other students, and the teacher may have to spend more time with that student while the rest of the class receive less attention and teaching time.

The class may also be distracted by the special needs student and the teacher may struggle with limited ability in dealing with special needs children.

Before your child is included in a mainstream classroom setting, it is important to decide in advance how your child would respond to a greater number of children in the classroom, a faster pace of teaching, and how they would interact with their regular peers who have always been in mainstream education.

For successful inclusion of your special needs child, the school needs to have a number of educational components in place. These include having a curriculum that is language based and a form of teaching that progresses throughout the day and achieves measurable goals.

The curriculum for children with learning disabilities must also address multiple skill development and record pertinent data, with frequent review and change where necessary.

By considering the above factors, you will be able to make an informed decision about what would be the best educational option for your child. I wish you the very best of luck with educating your child no matter what option you chose.

Making The Most Of The Special Education Process For Educating Special Needs Children

In this article I am going to tell you how to make the most of the special education process when it comes to educating your special needs child.

The reason I am going to tell you this is because it is so easy to become overwhelmed when it comes to matters concerning the education of your child and finding your way around the special education process.

In this article I am going to teach you

• The main mistakes that parents of special needs children make in the Special Education Process
• How to make sure that you get the most out of the Special Education Process

Firstly, the main mistakes parents make in the special education process are mainly around poor record keeping and not understanding what they are signing or agreeing to. Withholding information, misinterpreting information and making ill-informed decisions are other mistakes that parents tend to make.

As a parent, not only do you know your child better than anyone else, but there will be some information that can only be gathered by specialists. This information will be very necessary for special educational people to access to decide the best education plan for your child.

If you are unsure of anything, you need to ask for clarification and be very sure of the understanding of anything you are asked to sign as it is very hard to get some things overturned or amended when you formally agreed in writing.

Do not feel under too much pressure to sign something you have not had a chance to read in full or if you feel you are not quite sure if you have understood correctly what the implications are if you do sign for something concerning educating special needs children.

Poor communication with the school or difficult relationships with educational personnel resulting in decisions being made for your child whether wrong or right also cause great distress for parents who are trying to find their way around the special needs process.

To make sure you get the most of the special education process, it is vital you keep correct and up to date records about your child and agree to have your special needs child take part in relevant and important educational and developmental assessments.

Having your child assessed is never easy but it is so important if they are to get the most from the educational system they are either part of or will form part of.

It is also vital to keep up a professional relationship with all relevant special education staff and not to withhold information which may be pertinent to your Child's educational welfare.

Should You Home School Your Special Needs Child?

In this article I am going to tell you what you need to consider when it comes to home schooling your special needs child. The reason I am going to tell you this is because people generally tend to have very definite opinions on home schooling and as a parent of a special needs child, this may be an option you wish to consider.

In this article I am going to teach you

• What a home school is all about
• What are the advantages for your special needs child?
• What are the disadvantages for your special needs child?
• How to decide if this is a viable option for your special needs child

Home schooling allows parents or carers the legal option of having their children tutored at home and not in a formal school setting. This is carried out for a variety of reasons, many of which simply boil down to the matter of personal choice. This is also a choice that applies for special needs children.

For those who prefer to have their children taught at home, they cite a number of reasons for preferring the home school option over attendance at a formal school. These include medical reasons where a child may be too ill to attend school or prone to infections he or she may catch from others in a school setting.

A child may have behavioural or emotional problems which would cause distress to them in a school with many others. The child may be a slow learner and not be able to "keep up" with other students in a classroom setting.

Parents may also lack confidence that the school will be able to meet their special needs child educational needs or may not approve of the way the curriculum is taught.

Other reasons for educating at home include religious beliefs, distance to the school, anti social behaviour in the school and potential effects of peer pressure on their impressionable child.

The main reasons cited for those who disprove of the home schooling route include not being qualified to teach, wanting their kids to have lots of friends and learn socialization skills and having their kids integrated into system that will give them the same advantages and access to resources as everyone else.

Only you as parent or principal caregiver to a special needs child can decide if providing a home school environment for your child is a viable option.

You may have strong beliefs either way but just try to detach yourself from these beliefs and think about and ask advice from reputable people who are pro and anti home schooling before making an informed decision.

Individualized Family Service Plan - Help for Families of Young Children With Developmental Delays

Individualized family service plans (IFSPs) are a tool to assist parents of children with disabilities from birth through the age of two. They are created collaboratively by multi-agency teams of professionals and the family of the child with a suspected developmental delay. IFSPs revolve around helping the family to facilitate the child's development. The guidelines for IFSPs are spelled out in Part C of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) and all states in the United States have laws and processes for providing early intervention services.

Children are usually referred to early intervention services through their doctor or through child find services available from your local school district. In some states, IFSPs are coordinated through the Department of Education and in other states, IFSPs are coordinated through the Department of Human Services. If you Google your state's name and IFSP you should be able to find the resources you need. If you have a child who exhibits developmental delays in their physical, cognitive, communicative, social and emotional and/or adaptive skills areas they may qualify for an IFSP.

IFSPs may include screenings, providing a range of therapies to the child, providing family training, providing financial assistance, providing important medical and educational information and providing emotional support to the families of children with developmental delays in one or more areas. Services are not based on financial need and service fees are usually based on a sliding fee scale and vary from state-to-state. There is a strong emphasis on providing support to families of underserved populations, which include; children of color, children living in poverty, homeless children, children living in rural communities and children who are wards of the state

IFSPs are generally revised annually and reviewed every six months or sooner if the parents put in a request for an earlier review. IFSPs are focused on the family as a whole rather than just the individual child because the environment that the child is developing in strongly correlates with their development. Services from agencies are not forced upon parents but are offered to assist the parents in helping their child to reach developmental milestones. The child find team usually includes professionals from the field of education, the medical field, the social services field, the pediatric therapy field and the counseling field.

This diverse team usually screens and assesses the child and then works with the family based on their level of need in different areas to access services their child may need. Whenever possible, therapies are provided in the natural environment of the home or community to enhance the families ability to help their child develop the skills they need and to foster independence. If the team determines that services and support are no longer needed the IFSP may be closed. Usually a few months prior to a child's 3rd birthday, children with developmental delays will be reassessed to determine their eligibility for special education services, which may begin on a child's 3rd birthday if he or she is deemed to be a child with a disability as defined in Part B of IDEA.

How To Go About Educating Your Special Needs Child In A Mainstream School

In this article I am going to tell you how to go about educating your special needs child in a mainstream school. The reason I am going to tell you this is because it is important to make an informed decision about what will work best for your child when it comes to meeting their education needs.

In this article I am going to teach you 

• How schools and local authorities address educating special needs children
• How to determine whether your child is ready for integration into mainstream school
• Whether any additional assessments are needed prior to educating your special needs child in mainstream education
• What additional resources may be required for your special needs child
• What you can do to help your child integrate into the mainstream educational system.

When it comes to educating special needs children in mainstream schools; the local authority and school under consideration must first determine whether having your child at the school will cause a disruption to the teaching carried out at the school.

Some children may have emotional problems and can disrupt the teaching time and impact on fellow class mates also.

They will also need to determine whether it is cost effective for your child to attend and this mainly depends on the level of special needs of your child (mild, moderate, severe or profound).

If it would cost too much money to put systems in place specifically for your child, then a more specialised school may be required.

You may want to educate your special needs child in the mainstream school but you need to consider will your child's needs be met which is the most important consideration.

To integrate into the mainstream system, you need to be confident that your child will fit in. How well can they and do they communicate with others? Do they form relationships with their peers?

The last thing you want for your child is to put them into a situation that they will find uncomfortable, intimidating and overwhelming.

When it comes to educating special needs children you need to give the school any reports you have on your child and they will then determine if more specialised assessments are needs prior to them making a decision. They will then be in a position to assess and advise whether they have sufficient special needs resources in place or can access them in time for your child to start school.

If accepted to mainstream school, you can help your special needs child by making them familiar with the school and its layout, ask for a tour from someone working in the special needs section of the school and meet the teacher in advance if possible.

Discuss with your child what a typical day will be like at mainstream school for them. Be open to their questions and if unsure about anything, put these questions to the school.

There will of course be a period of adjustment for your child, but with your help the transition can run smoothly and your precious child can integrate into mainstream school.

How Does a Parent Make a Special Education Referral for Their Child?

As a parent, you may make a special education referral for your child at any age up to sixteen. Many parents believe that only school personnel are allowed to do this and that is incorrect. According to Section 300.300 of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), "either a parent of a child or a public agency may initiate a request for an initial evaluation to determine if the child is a child with a disability." There are different regulations and procedures according to the age of your child that I will outline here.

If your infant, toddler or child is not in school and you suspect that he/she is not developing appropriately and that your child may have a disability it is a good idea to discuss this with your child's pediatrician. They have specialized training in detecting disabilities and will make a referral to early intervention services for you if they concur with your suspicions. It the pediatrician does not concur they will usually provide you with some education and suggestions regarding your concerns. Many parents are unaware that children with disabilities are entitled to certain services from birth. Early intervention is often referred to as the Child Find Process.

If your child is in school and you suspect that he/she may have a disability that impedes his/her learning it is best practice to discuss your concerns with your child's primary teacher. School personnel should be trained to look for clues that a child may be in need of special education services. In fact, the teacher may have already requested support and pre-referral interventions from the school's support team due to their concerns. School personnel are obligated to attempt to remediate the child's academic and/or behavioral concerns with research-based interventions for a time period prior to them being able to make an official referral. Pre-referral interventions are not considered part of the evaluation process for special education services.

The law in Part C of IDEA (for children birth-age 2) indicates that children who are referred to early intervention services requires that a screening, an assessment and the initial meeting need be completed within 45 days of the referral. The law in Part B of IDEA (for children age 3-21) states that the initial referral must be conducted within 60 days of receiving the parental consent to evaluate the child. There are exceptions to these timelines if the parent or child are not available for evaluation, or of the child is moved to another public school district and sufficient progress has not yet been made on the evaluation.

If you do not feel like you are getting the results you want with your child's teacher or pediatrician and you have significant concerns for your child, you may write a letter to your local school district indicating that you would like your child to be evaluated for special education. Early intervention is crucial for children with disabilities, which is why there are federal and state laws mandating evaluation and services from birth through the age of 21 of children with disabilities, when appropriate.